Wrestling with Unbelief

Sara’s musings;

“Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.”- Genesis 32:28 (NIV)

Have you ever daydreamed about a name change? If my name was this and not that I would be afforded this position and live there and not here and, and, and the knots got tighter and tighter around the brain 💆🏽🤦‍♀️💆🏽‍♂️until it felt like it was a twisted pretzel?

I love reading the story of Jacob especially this often quoted verse and claiming it as my own. But, I don’t like much about the lead in or lead out of his struggles to acclaim a nation’s name.

Jacob-Israel even had an angel speak to him announcing his name change. In remembering the story not much changed about his circumstances of those around him. But, it seems clear something inside Jacob changed to Israel?

Having gone through my own struggles wanting evil around me to change and not getting the results I wanted I am reminded my name seems to be a mood ring. 💍 My daydreaming HATS are often in motion 👒🎩🎓⛑👑👩🏻‍✈️👰🏼

But, when I hear the voice of the spirit with an open mind and ❤️ I know I have a name change!  The real question is how will I live up to my name in 2017?

I would like to invite you to a wrestling match? Calling all with names;  Prince Doubter, Ms Fear, King Unbeliever, Mademn Rejection,  Father Confusion, among others….Win a wrestling match 🀄️and claim your trophy NAME…belief, certainty, confidence, faith, reliance, trust❗️

Don’t be afraid of imagination just fear not imagining. ❤️ Sara


31 thoughts on “Wrestling with Unbelief

  1. When I read this blog of Sara’s this afternoon it reminded me of something Sara wrote that I read earlier this morning. I had been reading in one of her workbooks, The Four Bees, Finding Your Spiritual Gifts. The page I had turned to was part of “Lesson 2 – Saying Power, Bee of Budding – Creative Expression.” To me, the essence of what I was reading was encouraging me to pursue my authentic self. An excerpt from what I read said: “What is the passion of your passions? What do you have secretly hid away in your little journal that you’ve never told anyone about – that you’ve never even believed yourself? The secrets are there. It’s your authentic self coming into view. Your soul peaking into view, just budding. And God said with Him all things are possible. You can do all things through Him because His desire is enlightenment for your mind. For God says that you, too, can have His mind. You too, can rise up above the circumstances of your life. You can rise up above the old soul nature that tells you lies, about yourself. Stop using lying powers and speaking untruths about yourself even if you think no one is listening. You have to just put words out into the universe, into an ocean of waves of doubt and fear. You just gave rain to a weed seed and let a weed tree bud in your mind. You are in ‘the now moment’ to weed out anything except your God given passions and your authentic self”…
    When I read this blog about Jacob and his name change, I thought he had to wrestle to find his authentic self, the person God really intended him to become. Now, I haven’t wrestled in a ring, but I have wrestled with weeds in a garden and it’s hard work to get them out so productive, beautiful plants can grow. “Prince Doubter, Ms Fear, King Unbeliever, Mademn Rejection, Father Confusion, among others” reminded me of weeds, some of which I read about this am in Sara’s Bee lesson.

    There is so very much to think on in this blog Sara. Thanks for writing it.

    1. Whoa! Debi, your connective knowing and sharing is awesome. Seems when we like the wise men of old were on a spiritual hunt they found the spirit giver. We take the hand of Hope and search and we find a 🔑🕯….look 👀What Pamela Hawkins served us in one of my morning devotions.

      “HOPE OPENS SOMETHING in the human heart. Like shutters slowly parting to admit a winter dawn, hope permits strands of light to make their way to us, even when we still stand in cold darkness; but hope also reveals a landscape beyond us into which we can live and move and have our being. With hope, closely held interior thoughts are gently turned outward; deep desires, perhaps long hidden in secret corners of our heart, might be lifted up to the light. At times, hope peels back the edges of our imagination to free what waits underneath – a changed life, a new resolve, a yes pregnant with possibility. In other moments hope dares us to unfold a layer of desire – for relationship, for clarity, for courage.”– Pamela C. Hawkins Simply Wait: Cultivating Stillness in the Season of Advent

      🦉🦉🦉🦉🦉🦉🦉I’m thinking an old 🦉 Knows a lot more than me❗️

  2. “Don’t be afraid of imagination just fear not imagining. ❤️ Sara”

    I love Hope and I love imagination! In Pamela’s writings above I catch a glimpse of hope for change for good. I have come to believe communication is on a low. So many carry thoughts, ideas, and dreams as well as shame, guilt, rejection among other to birth. Yet, still birth is so often the result of our dream pregnancies. Hopefully, through these blogs and other lines of communication we learn how truth is light 💡and 💡is truth.

    1. Sara, thanks for sharing what Pamela C. Hawkins ‘served’…it was a generous helping to feed on and was encouraging.
      Also, I have been thinking on your quote, “Don’t be afraid of imagination just fear not imagining. ❤️ Sara”.
      I wonder if God wants and waits for us to imagine so that He can then do so much more than we just imagined?
      “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us,” Eph 3:20

    2. Imagination….Ok…. I have this favorite video of a winter picture from a site called: Honest Guys – It is a winter snow with trees and wind and a crackling fire place sound. And in this video they have put on a “fake” window pane. Lovely.
      I put this video on and pretend Jesus and I are at this window, that it’s a house we have in this winter wonderland and I play music. I can sing to Him or another selection of hymns or the instrumentals = lovely. It is so real, as I know He gives us the gift of our imagination..to use to be with Him – for His consolation and company which He loves ( one should read the awesome book: He and i by Gabrielle Bossis! available from: amazon.com
      It is full of such loveliness. And I know He loves us to do this. It is taken as if real…from Him… and He give us the grace to experience His loving Presence. Very peaceful as I just love watching snow fall and hear the wind!

      So a friend of mine on line, a dear spiritual Sister in Christ, Mary Grace suggested I send this to you to share. God bless and love you and yours.
      Patricia Owens – NJ

      1. Patricia, gorgeous use of your holy imagination. How lovely to share your window on the “”woods filling up with snow” a’ la Robert Frost, with Jesus, Whom I am sure inspired the great poet in these lovely lines.
        Please share more with us as you exercise your gift of imagination to day dream of lovely things with Jesus Christ your Bridegroom.
        Thanks so much for sharing this. It is a blessing…

  3. Debi gives us this quote above, “And God said with Him all things are possible. You can do all things through Him because His desire is enlightenment for your mind. For God says that you, too, can have His mind.” Phil 2:4 ESV “Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,…”

    And, 👀👀👀👀🦉🦉🦉Romans 12:2 NIV “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is–his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

  4. Thinking about Sara’s caveat above, “Don’t be afraid of imagination just fear not imagining. ❤️” To imagine is to be like our God. Only, using a holy imagination emanating from a renewed mind. And in 1 Cor. 2:15.. Paul says.”but we have the mind of Christ!” …we are free in the liberty of the Spirit of God to imagine great things not fearing judgment of men; to create similarly without the fear of someone’s disapproval. Oh! That is true liberty.
    The Lord God said in Gen 15 that anything they imagined would be possible to them.
    This is full spectrum of God’s gift of imagination full-blown in man…whether put to good use or evil. As Paul warns, ” casting down [unholy or evil] imaginings and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of Who God is…” But to those who are of a renewed mind, in Christ Jesus, anything is possible . Liberty in Christ Jesus !

  5. I would like to share a recent sighting of imagination I experienced. First, most often, very seldom if ever, my imagination is not about me, I’m sure that would be vain and disastrous.

    I have been praying for a family member for healing and her adult children. For a few days the same sighting with hearing scripture kept appealing to me in the form of imagination. I heard and saw the famous painting we often see with this scripture. Revelation 3:20 (KJV) (Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.” I finally reread the scripture with an open mind to allow my imagination to be the vehicle that delivers the sighting.

    Few hours later I had opportunity to speak with the one I had been praying for and her daughter for about an hour and half. It was a glorious experience. She shared an expierience that as she was going through surgery and what was called near death experience. She saw, heard and seemed immersed into God Himself. And, she heard scripture quoted over and over that kept her encouraged to heal.

    We then had a singing-fest of worshiping lead and sung by her daughter. That was awesome! As we were closing our communication I asked about her brother, a minister. She got new energy and told me of his visit and her great love for him. She said when he came he brought her the most beautiful framed photo of Jesus standing at he door and knocking…I then saw the reason and tools The Holy Spirit had used to bring this beautiful truth to light. I felt so connected to the fellowship table we shared around the ❤️ Of God. I’m not sure if her brother full of scripture was the one with her in her dark hour quoting scriptures. He knew to bring the photo and I knew to see in the spirit Jesus standing at ❤️’S door knocking, she heard and opened her heart as did some of those around us.

    Imagination is so full of life giving.

  6. What a wonderful account of imagination, Sara! It reminded me of something you replied on December 30 to your blog titled, “Justice in out inward” where you said: “I believe in mind-visual approach (my way of doing things)….I have an artistic thought and to grow my thought I find an image to correlate with my thinking and before I know it I’m living it as if it were always mine.”
    The picture of Rev 3:20 you describe above sure confirms that.

  7. Sitting before dawn by a blazing fire glowing in my fire place with my two doggies with their two best buds on a visit for today has set my scene to read your different thoughts on imagination. Awe, a nice mug of freshly ground coffee brewed to perfection. A slight sound on my wind pane as rain drifts by to introduce me to my day.

    My iPad is drawing my attention to happenings plan for today in political arenas just days before the changing of political power. All reads and looks so ominous.

    Each story and share from each one’s nook seemly all are viewing their view from a wide angle lense. The one thing I glean from each of you is how Jesus is so tightly woven in your dreams. He’s with you, them, me and us! I am in dream of His message; “Love one another as I have loved you” John 13:34-35

    Thanks to each of you for our fireside chat. 💞

  8. Sara, it seems you have revived the old presidential ”fireside Chats”!! But this time in the spirit! Uh.. In the ”[presidential sense] It is truly transition time! I’ll be sure to ‘tune in”.

    1. MG, fireside chats are one of my favorite things. They at times have the ability to split the Word atom. We often sing, little is much when God is in it…..imagination spreads its wings🕊🦅 at the sound of the Word and creation evolves 🐣🐥.

  9. The sermon title at my church this past Sunday, January 22, 2017 seemed to go right along with our blog. The title: “An Absent Faith”. The message preached was centered in the book of Luke, chapter 8:25. I thought the preacher’s comment on verse 24 was interesting….”they drew a conclusion, but left God out of it.”…….when they said they would drown. Any thoughts?

    1. Would ‘Unbelief’ mean the same as ‘an absent faith?’ The conclusion was simply we are goners. I don’t get preacher’s point ‘they left God out of it?’ Sounds like they got God (Jesus) involved.

      1. Maybe I have taken some of the message out of context? Please forgive me .I invite all to listen to the message online at://countrysidecc100.com..

    2. Tammy, Some musings…. on faith. as seen in the Word

      When Jesus said, ‘’where is your faith’’it seems that if they’d had faith it was not In evidence….since He Who see all did not seem to witness to their faith. True, Sara might say…that they cried out to Jesus which showed they had faith in Him…yet, why would He question it, then?
      And according to the LORD It doesn’t take much faith…as Jesus said….if you had only just as much as a mustard seed….. that much faith can toss a mountain into the sea. That’s pretty good! Yet He said to them, often, when He was disappointed in their responses or actions…. ‘’oh ye of LITTLE faith.’’ So their faith must have been LESS than a mustard seed. Maybe that’s why HE didn’t witness to their faith and had to call it into question.
      We know that faith comes by hearing…and hearing by the Word of God. They had been running with the Living Word, Jesus Christ, for almost three years and still seemed to disappoint Him when it came to full-fledged faith in Him. Peter’s denial being an example. Thomas, who doubted Him. Judas who betrayed Him. So it seems that when it comes to manifesting our faith in word or deed, our deeds don’t always match our words.
      Some of us have trouble with that not only in faith issues.

      1. MG, look at what I found on the size of the mustard seed: Mustard seed – “Wikipedia
        Wikipedia › wiki › Mustard_seed
        Mustard seed. Percentages are roughly approximated using US recommendations for adults. Mustard seeds are the small round seeds of various mustard plants. The seeds are usually about 1 to 2 millimetres (0.039 to 0.079 in) in diameter and may be colored”

  10. Thanks for sharing the online message link Tammy. As listened to most of it and especially to the part related to Luke 8:24, 25, I did not hear the preacher say, “but left God out of it.” But what I thought I heard him say was that they “immediately drew a conclusion” (that they were going to drown) “without the equation of faith, without the understanding of who Jesus was.”
    So when Sara wrote, ” Sounds like they got God (Jesus) involved.”, it sounded to me like the preacher was saying that also because he said they came to Jesus and woke Him up, but they “discounted the presence of the One who created the wind and waves”, etc.
    In response to Sara’s question, “Would ‘Unbelief’ mean the same as ‘an absent faith?’, my take-away understanding from listening ( and reading the scripture) would be yes because the disciples must not have believed that Jesus could save them from drowning or that He was in control.
    Sounds to me like the disciples really “wrestled with unbelief'” that day.

  11. Tammy, I listened to this point packed sermon with seemly many illustrations . He gave some points early on about quoting scripture without the connector word. I glean this from his point of, ‘ where two or three are gathered….’

    I did think Tammy he left confusion around the scripture we are using here being Luke 8:24. Yet he did quickly give us Mark’s take on this. I don’t think you misquoted him. He quickly went all to family issues etc. which is another point that might clinch our minds in a freeze.

    Tammy, I think you have done a very good thing to hear a sermon, review, search, share and desire to find ways to listen, hear and obey. It sure helps to communicate and find those that communicate with us and are on a search for truth. I sure understand totally why this part of his sermon stood out to you as this is the part we are studying here. Nice to have Pastor join us with his voice through his Sunday sermon. Kinda of interesting how you a nurse ID’ed this faith point which is our blog struggle here. I was thinking about how we isolate a cell that could tell us a physical flaw. In just a few he was in the OR with a nose issue. 🙃 I think that’s what he said…he packs a lot of stories in to illustrate his points.

    You Tammy being a seeker of truth and wanting others to benefit from God’s word found a way to open us up to a different way of thinking on faith. Thank you! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  12. I want to add another thought to our boat story. The part I love best, the disciples called Jesus, Master. What do I call Him by my words and actions at times? Ashamed to say.

  13. Another thing I wanted to share regarding Pastor’s sermon that Tammy shared was a poem he recited near the end. It really got my attention because I had just read it a couple of days ago in a book that Sara had given years ago for study! The book is by Ruth Paxson, ‘Life on the Highest Plane’. The chapter I was reading was titled, ‘The Christian’s Choice – Self or Christ?’ The poem was at the very end of the chapter.
    Apparently the poem was written by Theodore Monod in 1874. I think it really relates to the opening sentence of Sara’s blog, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.”- Genesis 32:28 (NIV)”

    “Oh, the Bitter Shame and Sorrow

    “Oh, the bitter shame and sorrow,
    That a time could ever be,
    When I let the Saviour’s pity
    Plead in vain, and proudly answered–
    “All of self, and none of Thee.”

    Yet He found me; I beheld Him
    Bleeding on the cursed tree;
    Heard Him pray, “Forgive them, Father,”
    And my wistful heart said faintly–
    “Some of self, and some of Thee.”

    Day by day His tender mercy,
    Healing, helping, full and free,
    Sweet and strong, and ah? so patient,
    Brought me lower while I whispered–
    “Less of Self, and more of Thee.”

    Higher than the highest heavens,
    Deeper than the deepest sea,
    Lord, Thy love at last hath conquered:
    Grant me now my soul’s petition–
    “None of self, and all of Thee”

  14. I Love that poem. Thanks for posting it, Debi. It describes the transition into holiness’ by the humbling of self .It’s a long drawn-out process. One step forward, two back but spurred on by the Holy Spirit and the Cross of Christ.. to.a deeper, higher place in HIM. So that, when He appears, we shall be like Christ.. None of us and All of HIM

  15. Just beyond my thinking of these multi facets of connections to the heavenly realm. This one and that one all registered in His Kingdom responded from readings and understandings on the Kingdom of God. Seekers and searcher all clothed in righteousness and making a pilgrimage on thedailylily website to find The King. Now that’s a story!

    Ruth Paxron one of my very favorites. And the delight I see/feel in seeing some of one of my favorite Psalms lived out in real time. Debi, do you remember singing this Psalm? Register it here!🌈

  16. Sara, I believe this is the Psalm and song you are referring to?

    City oh city, oh city of God
    Glorious things are spoken of you
    City oh city, oh city of God
    Glorious things are spoken of you

    Such glorious things are spoken of you
    City oh city oh city of God
    Glorious things are spoken of you

    2. This one and that one were born in her
    All my springs of joy are in you
    This one and that one were born in her
    All my springs of joy are in you

    Yes, all my springs, of joy are in you
    This one and that one were born in her
    All my springs of joy are in you.

    3. Singers and dancers together say
    All my springs of joy are in you
    Singers and dancers together say
    All my springs of joy are in you

    Yes all my springs of joy are in you
    Singers and dancers together say
    All my springs of joy are in you.

    From Psalm 87

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