“I am sorry”
Can be the most important words one might ever say or hear. Or, they may be the most disappointing words one might say or hear.
I learned at my Mothers knees these three tiny words were only to be uttered from the purest of heart. They were meant never to be uttered often and not for deceptive motives. I was never told in my remembrance to say to my sibling that I just mistreated or spoke ugly to, “now say you are sorry” knowing I was going to do it again. We were spoken to about why we did the ugly. And, it’s consequences. To be honest there were times I did ugly and not sorry for it and my Mother knew it.
I didn’t know at the time my Mother was preparing me for the greatest earth happening ever in the life of the Christian Faith. One day her Hope was The Holy Spirit would co-counsel me along with her on what ugly, “I am sorry” really meant and the end result would be ugly to Holy. The understanding came to me very early in life that I was so “ugly” as part of living in a world of sin, death and corruption that I wanted peace, beauty and exactness. I was taught there was only one way and it was a very narrow way. Matthew 7:13-14 records, “Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat: 14) Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it.” Yes, from the KJV of the Bible I was taught the meaning of, I am sorry.
I could write volumes on this subject. And, you might ask, don’t you need to say sorry to others when you have wronged them? Absolutely, you should speak truth! Are you sorry? (Dictionary, 1) feeling regret, compunction, sympathy, pity, etc)? If so what do you plan to do about it other than utter words to try and cover your sorry hide. (Dictionary-2) sorry “wretched, poor, useless, or pitiful: a sorry horse.)
I’m speaking from my humble opinion of the importance of these words, “I am sorry, because it seems Mother’s knees from my viewpoint are now, hit, punch, slap, verbal ugly, lie, deceive in word or dodge, gun or whatever might empower your ego just go for it. The old way of parenting with The Holy Spirit is a butt joke in many churches. The straight and narrow of the road that leads to a follower of Jesus and Holy Living according to the New Testament (NT) of the Bible guidelines are mute in much of today’s society. To be important in myself I need to punch back harder, call others the most insulting names my limited thinking can come up with, have no love for others unless they look like me and act like me. Yeap! Ugly begets Ugly! Ugly is as Ugly does.
Hate seems to have become the norm. Love has been extracted like the removal of an aching ‘wisdom’ tooth. The NT gives in words the results of, The Cross, Sacrifice of Blood, The Messiah, The Savior of the World, love out of hate, life out of death, peace out of chaos, Eternal out of temporal.
Now granted my thoughts might sound ancient and be archaic. Therefore, I (we) would love hearing your experiences with, “I am sorry.” (My Mother and Father)
“…let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” Matthew 5:16 ESV
I gradually awoke this morning with this scripture scintillating in my being. It seem to be head knowledge or head quote words. Then a little closer to reality of awake, it’s morning, I found myself on my imaginary step ladder with a few steps down and a few to go before out of attic head knowledge into the light of heart. Awe! I found tucked away from dark, meaning people I don’t like, a host of greats: I am hopeful, blessed, loved, happy. Well, a treasure of “lightsabers” in action.
I’v starting thinking about, seeking answers to, good works? I know without a doubt and by faith, Jesus is the Light, the bright and morning Star. He shines through us. But, where does the shine go? Is it hidden in a heart of bitterness, malice, meanness, unforgiving, unloving, all about me and my few? My secrets, you don’t deserve, you, you, you and me, me. That is ugly work. A constant battle. Why not light of good works so others might see and give glory to our Heavenly Father because our heart ugliness is gone.
Then within minutes of dusting off my ‘lightsaber”, a light of kindness broke through causing my God Given true colors to begin to put off sparks. My cousin, Brenda, posted this.
“One lesson in life you should ALWAYS remember is when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock somewhere else.” A Light in the dark FB post
Then another kindness from my Today’s Reflections, “I would love hearing an example from your own life where the Holy Spirit has widened your circle to include someone you had previously excluded.“
What, another, three?
“One thing that’s always helped me when I’ve woken up feeling down is to put my hand over my heart, take several deep breaths, and honor the feeling. Then, I ask it to leave.” Marie
I’m looking forward to lights of hope to brighten our day!
Rena Oynes (photo) on her way to Bible Study Fellowship, aka BSF, a branch in Alabama. Rena studies and works in Children’s ministry there as well as teaching Sunday School in her local Baptist Church.
Rena painted a Cardinal for Thedailylily for our Christmas enjoyment 2018. This little bright red Cardinal fluttered onto a sweatshirt made by Custom Ink. They did a great job to give praise to all of us that write and often journal our thoughts here. If you could read the ensign that has been silk screened on the shirt Rena is wearing you would read, “I know every bird on the mountains…for all the world is mine.” Psalm 50:11-12
Fly High in 2019!
Peeks with a wink in windows everywhere🌏 Hope the peek-wink is welcome with joy for the New Year, 2019, in homes and hearts around the globe!
I had the opportunity of sharing in a listening group by Msgr. Lloyd Torgerson of St Monica Catholic Community, California. He surely peaked-peeked my interest by asking a question that he had been asked recently, “What is it like to really be you right now.”
He had been asked, “what is it really like to be you right now?” He was able to answer so thoughtfully from his inner being. He first recognized that he was being a Pastor from the age of now being 79 which rode into his life with a few new energy limitations. He felt more freer to be himself than ever before, more peaceful and grateful to have a reservoir of Grace to draw from among other interesting thoughts of knowing himself.
Monsignor was so interesting in sharing living in his now moment. He surely shepherded the heart of each listener into Hope, slow down, communicate, listen, share. The moral of his sharing from my peak-peek was taking time and heart to have meaningful conversations with others regardless of who they are or where you find others. Learn from one another.
I want to start now my asking you, yes you, “what’s it like to be you right now”?
“Every man’s life ends the same way. It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another.” — Ernest Hemingway
Often I find ‘Holiday Hoopla’ are the least spiritual days of a year. Or, maybe I should say of a life story. It seems blood family worship happens in the minds of many that are church goers. We worship ‘King Santa’. We adore ‘Elf Gift’. We sing praises to ‘Amazon Prime’ and kneel to the latest ‘Easy Clean’.
Past wounds fester with a contagious infection. While, new knocks are seen with blood running scabs. When we start the blame turkey game and stuff it with names , my kids, my Mom, my Dad even had the audacity to die? The parade to entertain must go on.
Did or does anyone say to us, “He was wounded for our transgression, He was bruised for our iniquities. Surely He bore our sorrows and by His stripes we are healed. Or, are these words as tried as an old stick of gum or silly as a ball on a tree. It’s a lot more soothing to watch a feral kitten unwind our knitting ball or a wounded dog wear our winter wonder land shawl as the fire warms the sore. It only takes a spark of God’s love to get a fire going. That how it is with God’s love when we pass it on. 🎼🎹
“…It is only the details of how he lived and how he died that distinguish one man from another.” — Ernest Hemingway
I have been thinking on this quote and granted I’m on the older side rather than the new born side and I feel shame about many of my ‘Holiday Hoopla Shenanigans’.
Now, before you call me cynical or religious or out of touch let me just say I’m all in on Santa, reindeers, gifts, family and beer. (I don’t drink beer because I don’t like the taste neither do I like spinach) You name it, it’s all good. I’m in for fun. Now, about the details of how we live our lives that just might distinguish us from one another is the point. I made myself a little flash test to see how I score on details?
Spiritual Craft-who taught me spiritual craft-what does their life look like? Who is my now spiritual traveling companion-what does their life look like at this moment?
More specific to my life details-holiday Hooplas-do they separate me from my daily family, friends and communications? Do I live my life in a cage of fear and intimidation? In keeping my holidays real, do I treat others as I would/do treat Jesus? Does honesty and trust from my being sound like the thrill of hearing church bells chime on a chilly starry night? Welcome one and all. Or, does my family and I say to some, there is no room in our Inn, but if your desperate take the stinky stable. Leave the Eternal King in the stable and crown my kids as I teach them my way and not His?
O Holy Night the Stars are brightly shining, 🌠